In this Episode:
Do you feel stuck in your life professionally or personally? Would you like to get “unstuck”? On the show today my guest is Laura Gassner Otting, the author of Limitless: How to Ignore Everybody, Carve Your Own Path, and Live Your Best Life. Laura believes that “consonance” is the key to living a limitless life and on the show we discuss what that means, how to use her unique framework to get “unstuck” and live life on your terms, the value of owning your ambition as a woman, and much more!
Laura is a a serial entrepreneur who has started and sold a successful international executive search firm and served as a Presidential Appointee in Bill Clinton’s White House, helping shape AmeriCorps. In the context of the book, Limitless is the concept of moving away from a “singular” definition of success and to create your own which is something we discuss often on this podcast. Laura and I agree that if you spend time worrying about someone else’s definition of success you lose your way and what’s possible for you.
People get stuck because of faux humility. The best anecdote to being stuck is movement but we’ve lost our ability to be ambitious. It is important to ask “What do I really want?” She asks women “Would being in a position of power allow you do to more for the people you love? Can you say, ‘I can own that big dream. I can dare to think of myself as the person that belongs in that place.’ Own that for yourself. Do what do you need to do first. Feel like you deserve it. Demand that shot.”
When you demonstrate more competence you gain more confidence. Laura takes us through the 4 C’s that make up “consonance”.
The Four C’s of Consonance:
- Calling – she helped people find work in non-profit for 25 years but for many people their purpose is buying a beach house and having a sports car. In the book, she says “that’s okay”. The only person who should get a vote is you. Whatever drives is you is all that matters.
- Contribution. Ask yourself, “What do I want my life to look? Does this allow me to manifest the life that I want?”
- Connection – Ask – “if I didn’t get out of bed – would anyone notice? Why do I matter?” We get busy, but is what you are doing quality time and focused on what matters to you?
- Control – does my work allow me to have control over the amount of connection and contribution with others.
Laura’s 3 Best Tips
- “Write your plans in pencil. There is no part of your life that is directional forever. If you want to change – change.”
- “No is a complete sentence. I’m sorry but I can’t…” is a phrase you should feel comfortable saying.”
- “Let’s stop leaning in with one definition of success and define it on our own terms and lean in to that.
This episode was sponsored by Design a Life You Love, A Woman’s Guide to Living a Happier and More Fulfilled Life. My book includes 52 inspirations, one for every week of the year, each with practical tips to guide you to self-love and success on your own terms. It’s a short book that you can read in about an hour, but includes life lessons that will last a lifetime.
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